Skip to main content

No Sex Tonight [via www.fmbv.nu/no-sex-tonight/ ]

via www.fmbv.nu/no-sex-tonight/ 

No Sex Tonight



I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”
I said “WHAT??!! What was that?!”
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…
“You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man”.
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.
She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey”.
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all
dear, let’s go to the cashier”.
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel
like it”.
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
"WHAT?”.
I then said “honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.”
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”.
Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Timi Uta Ma Yeta (Sunsaan Raat Ma) Guitar Chords - Pratik Gurung Cover - Original by Milan Newar, Rajan Raj Shiwakoti

 I came across this song when Kanden Limbu sang this in Nepal Idol.  He was one of the contestants. I thought it was his original. Surprisingly, it is not. His was based on Pratik Gurung's cover. This is actually a full fledge song with a music video. Here's the original one. However, I like the cover version. Here are the chords for a portion of the song. The chords are based on this tutorial . In the tutorial, plucking is used. You can strum as well if that's what you prefer.  CAPO: 2nd fret STRUMMING: D-DU Plucking used: 5-2-3 (C and Am), 4-2-3 (FT and GT), 6-2-3 (G) Chords: C, Am, G Major, F Major Triad (FT), G Major Triad (GT) NOTE: It's easier if you play G Major in C's original position; just move 2 and 3 fingers one step up.   C                             Am (Sunsan raat ma yo mero aatma FT               GT    C Chasakka bi...

Pokhiyera Ghaam Ko Jhulka Guitar Chords|| Narayan Gopal || Ambar Gurung || Hari Bhakta Katuwal

  Pokhiyera Ghaam Ko Jhulka Guitar Chords || Narayan Gopal  Composer: Ambar Gurung Lyrics: Haribhakta Katwal Vocals: Narayan Gopal Guitar Chords based on tutorial by Nepali E-Chords . I take no responsibility if the chords are not absolutely right. But it sounded good enough for me.  Chords used: G, C, D, Am, Em, Bm Strumming: D-DUDU Intro: D       G      D             G              D      G Pokhiyera Ghamko Jhulka, Bhari Sangharama G                     D                     Em                G Timro Jindagiko Dhoka, Kholu Kholu Lagchha Hai Am                     C  ...

Ishq Ki Duniya | Sushant Ghimire | Guitar Chords | Lyrics

Ishq Ki Duniya CAPO 2nd Fret  * = C (without middle finger)- F - C (without middle finger) - C  (All single strokes) *  C                                       *  C                                        *     Tuta hai dil hai mera... hai na koi kasoor tera C                                                         *     C                                                   * Chhute hai haat ki lakirein ...